Tag Archives: recaps

Recap: Top Chef Seattle 10:5: Pike Place Problems

I meant to start recapping this season from the get-go because I am a huge Top Chef fan and I live in Seattle, but the first episode took place in Vegas and then they brought in the TWIST and I got depressed. The Twist was that after determining which cheftestants would make it to Seattle, and the show brought back three cheftestants from some of the earlier seasons (CJ, Season 3; Josie, Season 2; and Stefan, Season 5.)

I hate this. I was so irrationally angry when it happened that I actually paused the episode and ranted to my poor roommate. Here’s why: It’s not fair to anyone. It’s not fair to the returning cheftestants, who have a history with the judges and will be judged based on previous performance. It’s not fair to the judges to ask them to try and forget those preconceived notions. And it’s not fair to the new cheftestants who are finally getting their chance. Want to bring back people from previous seasons? Do another round of All-Stars or a Top Chef: SECOND CHANCE. Anhow. I got over it. So I’m here. FOR THE FOOD, Bravo, not the drama. Let’s begin.

Episode 5: Pike Place Market

We open with the cheftestans discussing their previous challenge. Tyler observes that being on top on day means nothing, since you can still get eliminated the next day. Glad we’ve cleared that up.

It’s Stefan’s 40th birthday, and apparently during his season, every chef who had a birthday during filming got eliminated on that day. He calls it the Birthday Curse and he’s worried.

The chefs arrive at Seattle’s famous Pike Place Market. You know, the fishing throwing place that you always see clips of on Food Network. It’s actually a lot more than a few fish stands, including lots of produce stands, flower stands, crafts, restaurants, and a whole bunch of local stores (including an awesome comic book store that is not shown). Today’s guest judge is local chef Daisley Gordon, who owns two restaurants in Pike Place, Marché and Café Champagne.

Quickfire Challenge! The cheftestants pair off and will compete in teams of two. Chef Gordon has provided them with a pantry and they have to set up kitchenettes using equipment from Sur La Table, which is up the hill in the Market. Josh and his mustache gets stuck with Tesar, whom he’s had some drama with already. This will end well. Each team has to make breakfast on a stick for the Market workers. The winning team gets immunity.

By the time Danyele and Liz get to the pantry, the eggs and dairy are gone, so they decide to do a European breakfast. Bart wants to do a twist on spinach and eggs. There’s total chaos at Sur La Table, where CJ steals a griddle from someone. Ruthless. Brooke has known Stefan for years so she knows how to get along with him. Actually getting along with your fellow chefs is a depressingly huge plus on this show. Seriously, guys, it’s easier if you work together. Bart drops his sandwich press and thinks it might be broken, but it’s okay.

  • Josh & Tesar – Mini breakfast taco with quail eggs and chorizo and an avocado relish. It looks really good. Chef Gordon likes the seasoning. 
  • Eliza & Josie – Ricotta, raspberry, and sausage pancake with a jalapeno syrup. They had me til jalapeno syrup. It doesn’t stay on the stick and Padma points out it looks like a layer cake. Gordon seems underwhelmed. 
  • Micah & Kristen – Bacon and cinnamon waffle with berry jam. 
  • CJ & Tyler – Salmon cream cheese crepe that miraculously stays on the stick. CJ says he really wants the win. Padma is like “DUH.”
  • Bart & Sheldon – Green forest sandwich with eggs, cheese, bacon, pancetta, and spinach. It looks really good. I want one in my face. Gordon calls it clever.
  • Danyele & Lizzie – Summer berries with crispy pancetta. This is easily the least ambitious dish of the day. I get that they missed out on eggs and such but it’s kind of a sad offering. Gordon likes it anyhow.
  • Brooke & Stefan – Pressed Croque Monsieur with fig on challah bread.

Disappointing teams: Danyele & Lizzie, for their scarce berries (no surprise), and Josie & Eliza for their ricotta pancake. Favorites: Sheldon & Bart’s green forest sandwich and Josh & Tesar, for their taco. Winners: Sheldon & Bart. CJ is visibly pissed off. Sorry, dude, your salmon wasn’t as good as the sandwich or mini tacos.

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Masterchef Recap: Episode 3.4 – The Top 18

Top 18!

This is the REAL start of the competition because if you didn’t make it this far, no one will remember you. The top 18 home cooks amateur chefs enter the Masterchef Kitchen for the first time except they also were there last week, so what? Ramsey waxes poetic about how you won’t find a better, more state of the art kitchen anywhere in the world.

Australia coughs politely but doesn’t have time to protest between their six Masterchef episodes a week. (SIX! Including a weekly Masterclass! I’m jealous.)

Tonight’s cocktail is called The Sweet and Sour Graham, because Graham can’t decide if he wants to be Simon Cowell or Paula Abdul, and weirdly enough it leaves Ramsey to play Good Cop more often than not.

1 1/2 ounces Peach or Orange Voda
Splash of Triple Sec
3 ounce Strawberry C Odwalla
Top with club soda and garnish with a strawberry

Three minutes in, Graham plugs the 3-piece Masterchef Knife collection and then they introduce a Mystery Box challenge. They can use only the ingredients in the box. The winner gets a huge advantage.

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TV Recap: Masterchef US 3.01 & 3.02

It’s that time again! Masterchef is back in the States. This is the show were amateur chefs compete in order to win some cash, a cookbook deal, and enough notoriety to launch their culinary career. (Do I sound like Padma?) But before we begin, let’s mix up a drink, shall we?

I’m dubbing tonight’s drink a SOUR JOE. It will wipe that sneer off anyone’s face!

2 oz Jameson (or preferred whiskey)
2 oz Club Soda
1 oz Sweet & Sour Mix

Mix in a shaker, serve over ice. Garnish with a lemon wedge. Voila!

(Note: Stoney didn’t invent the cocktail with a recap — I’ve seen it all over the place, and even on TWOP–but she and her crew of recappers are hilarious and awesome, so I suggest you check out Hey, Don’t Judge Me.)

All right, let’s get down to business. Since these are the fairly lackluster Top 100 Episodes, I’m going to do both in one go.

Episode 3.01:

EXT. A Shipyard Covered in Onion Crates

Camera montage of people talking about their love of food. Including a quirky girl with a big silver butterfly bow in her hair. Also a blind chick. But her dream is the same, y’all. Who said it wasn’t? They deserve a gut punch.

Music from some John Williams rip-off soundtrack. Ramsey tells us thousands of people applied but this group succeeded. Do they have what it takes? They applaud to say yes.

Joe shows the contests what $250K in cold, hard American cash looks like. Graham tells everyone cooking isn’t the path to fame, but the winner will get their own cookbook. YAY! Ramsey says the real prize is a trophy. I’m pretty sure the Aussies don’t get a trophy. (The Junior Masterchefs do though.. Also we need that show please.)

Graham flashes the apron. It’s not as dirty as it sounds. They tell the cheftestants they need to work for their chance to get one. Good luck, guys. This part is American Idol vicious.

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